Bee Here Now

Worst case scenario if all bees die out then humans will have four years to live. What I hear you cry? Well it may not be that apocalyptic yet but something needs to be done. Across America and Europe bee populations are decreasing by up to 80% as a mystery illness sweeps through the hives despatching out little bumbling friends and as they are responsible for a huge percentage of pollination should this continue it will also lead to the destruction of mankind.  They are responsible for pollination of approximately one third of the United States’ crop species, including such species as almonds, peaches, soybeans, apples, pears, cherries, raspberries, blackberries, cranberries, watermelons, cantaloupes, cucumbers and strawberries. To put it another way in the year 2000 the total U.S.A. crop of almonds, pollinated solely by bees was worth 15 billion pounds, so this is no small problem. But whether it’s a mystery illness, mobile phones or climate change that’s killing our stripy pals that is one for the scientists but I think we can all do our bit. When you ask the question ‘what do you want to be when you grow up?’ the reply is always Spaceman or rock star no one ever says beekeeper so lets all try to encourage the kids to get into beekeeping because the children can only be the future if there is one. Got a window? Then get a box plant some flowers and encourage the little tykes to get their knees all covered in your lovely pollen, if flowers are prostitutes for the bees then that’s makes you big daddy bee pimp, you could even get yourself a gaudy hat. Finally I’m going to launch the slogan ‘Think Bee’ next time your in the garden eating a pile of sugar and you are suddenly dive bombed by a bumblepig don’t role up the nearest copy of heat and start whacking the air for dear life no offer the bee some of your treats and when they accept give them a little stroke on their black and yellow jumper. Unless you are allergic and could go into anaphylactic shock in which case should you really be outside where there are bees?

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