Allergies are weird things, they don’t seem to serve any point, they are not a real illness like the flu or cancer, nine times out of ten they are just annoying. Like stopping you eating something you might like or stopping you getting near cute things that purr. Now I know there are extreme cases like kids who are allergic to the sun and have to wear special suits or squirrels and can’t walk around with nut filled pockets, there’s another one, nuts, they make my friends head swell up to three times its size and he dies, granted I have only seen this once so I don’t know if was an allergic reaction or not. You see there is a lot of guess work in the allergy field, like if your allergic to washing powder you have to take out a loan and try them all until you realise they do a special one that doesn’t really wash your clothes but at least it doesn’t make you itch. My own personal grievance and the reason I’m banging on about all things allergic is that mine pisses me off a lot. I have the annoying misfortune to be allergic to metal. But not all metal. I can still use spoons and drink from cans but I can’t wear metal backed watches or chains. I’m ok for say an hour or so then whoosh like a bush fire I’m a walking rash. It wouldn’t be so bad if I could resist the urge to scratch but I can’t. It feels so good to scratch an itch. But the thing is I forget all about my allergy, it’s not like a food one where eating it might kill you (its hard to forget something life threatening) so often it’s too late by the time I remember. Like if I’m in rush and put some jeans on without pants those little metal press-stud type tabs by the pockets will ruin my day. My friend brought me a ring that made my finger look like an itchier version of E.T.s and my sister once made me a chain that made me look like I had leprosy of the neck and that my head might fall off at any point. I think the most annoying thing about allergies is their attitude, the fact that they can come and go throughout your life and can’t be cured. You can take precautions, like if your allergic to feather pillows just don’t go to bed ever again, but seriously allergies what is the point? Some cosmic lesson? A reminder that we are fallible? A memory test? Or simply the most annoying thing since Joe Pasquale. You decide.