One thing I can’t stand is money rubbers. If you have ever taken money off a member of the public for a transaction you must surely have come across a money rubber. Money rubbers are distrusting folk; they don’t trust you and they believe they have more money than they do. Let me explain, your sitting on a checkout or the like and you tell the customer the price for example £6.80 they bring up their wallet and remove a £10 note and then right in front of your face start to rub it backwards and forwards between their thumb and forefinger. What they are doing is making sure that there isn’t two stuck together. Rub, rub, rub, what you don’t trust me? Like if I say £6.80 and you accidentally give me two £10s I’m not going to say ‘sorry sir you’ve given me too much’ and just keep the other £10? People who rub money in front of cashiers, its insulting, degrading and untrustworthy so stop doing it. You wish you could rub a tenner and its actually 5 stuck together, your not f*cking Paul Daniels, stop it, its one ten, your not Stringfellow give it to the cashier get your change and move on. No need to rub it for two minutes you c*nt its not magic its just a piece, one piece of brown paper with the queens head on. And if you think you have a problem with sticky money then I’m going to ask your wife where you were last night? In a strip club perhaps? The royal mint don’t make sticky money funnily enough so dude you got your bills all gunked up so they cant be pulled apart, how did you do that? Have you got a thing for her majesty? Its one tenner, move on. There is a small minority of people worse than money rubbers and that is the money flickers, they hold aloft a crispy ten in one hand and with the other hand flick it frantically to make sure its just one and surely the worst of them all is the blowers. They hold a note and blow on it like they are trying to put out a bush fire, they blow and blow on that single note trying desperately to make it two. If they had just trusted themselves and the cashier then maybe they wouldn’t have had that heart attack. Rubbers, flickers and blowers stop it you look like c*nts, honestly, no one likes you and if for any reason after rubbing, flicking and blowing on your cash you do accidentally hand me two tens or twenties instead of one, yes I’m going to keep the other because you are a patronising sh*thead. Get trust and get a life.